Prateek Gupta

It’s gonna take me a while to get back in the swing of things, but it is good to be writing again. Somewhere along the way, I stopped doing those things I am the most passionate about. I am not certain when or why that happened. I only know that it has been an extended period of time since I have done those things I used to be the most passionate about, writing, making beats and serious photography. The simple explanation could be that I got bored with it all. That may still be true but I think perhaps that it is more than that. I seem to have forgotten that there is a big difference between simply existing and actually living. If I am going to find my passions again, I need to start exploring more avenues in life. I need to find out what does excite me about living again. I may choose the wrong paths along the way, but that is what learning to live again is all about. Where the heck do I start? Is there a magic secret to it all? One thing I do know about myself is that when I do

"Hey" it is needless to say this word here, I bet no one expects posts from a person who prefer daydreams over reality. So, actually there is nothing new with me I've been Avoiding boredom and Avoiding accountability. How did I get here? Everything hurts. My mind is foggy as hell. I hate everyone and everything. I need to bite my tongue and save face as best I can. Avoid people. Next Month I'm off to Mumbai for a few days Drinking lots of water because the trainer said so also I don't want myself to be turning into a Junk Food eating werewolf. I cleaned my room. Sweating and with drawling and hating myself. Shame and guilt flooding my thoughts. I should finally write that final excerpt for my client Will I ever learn? something is wrong with me. My place is clean now. I still feel stable. I’m gonna read now until I fall asleep. Keep chugging back some water. It’ll be about a week or so before I feel good again. That’s what I get. Atoning for my sins. 

I haven’t had any reason to write in a while. I’m in this weird, content state of indifference. Stable. A down-to-earth, “dumb” state of ‘happiness’. I don’t really have anything to complain about. Passion? I’m not passionate anymore. What’s fucked up is that I don’t care that I’m not passionate anymore. Maybe I was never passionate in the first place. Maybe all these years my pretentiousness & ego got the best of me and blinded me from what I really am: a Business Guy I mean i don't have a fancy list of accomplishments but i have done some things. Sometimes my pompous, irrational ego gets the best of me and I think of myself as this suffering artist with all this passion. Its like everyone’s got a plan until they get punched in the face right !?  Also, I’m gonna wake up tomorrow and have a completely new, perspective on all of this passion thing. Now coming onto the title of the post I have a lot of extra aimless and senseless material which is of no use, i will be t